Aphrodite - Pop Trash Review

    I still remember the first time I heard Kylie's 1988 debut. I saved up to buy the cassette for a family roadtrip and ruthlessly tortured my siblings by demanding mum play it on repeat for the entire 6 hour journey. Even as a child I was all about sharing the Minogue love! Over the next 22 years, each new Kylie album has been an event that I've looked forward to and obsessed over. Some have been better than others but I always find something to love and appreciate. Even if it's a random Japanese bonus track ("Love Is Waiting" - the saving grace of 1994's self-titled cure for insomnia) or a so bad it's amazing triumph like "Nu-Di-Ty". One way or another, Kylie always delivers the goods for me. And that's particularly true of her 11th studio album. It's hard to believe but "Aphrodite" actually lives up to the hype. The endearing desperation of "Body Language" is a thing of the past and the sometimes jarring eclecticism of "X" has been reigned in. It's almost as if Team Minogue spent the past two years processing all the criticism and distilled the brand back to something that is quintessentially Kylie. The result is the pop icon's most consistent and cohesive offering since "Fever". At a time when albums have become hastily thrown together collections of singles and pointless filler, "Aphrodite" stands out by having a theme and expertly mapped out tracklist. It's also the antidote to the hypersexual skank-pop of Ke$ha and Lady Gaga. As much as I love their music, Kylie's bright eyed romanticism comes as a welcome relief. She's back doing what she does best - cute pop music with uplifting lyrics, catchy choruses and an unwavering eye for the dancefloor. Here is my track by track review:

    All The Lovers

    So dreamy, so lovely, such a bad lead single. Chart performance (in Australia) aside, I still think "All The Lovers" is one of the prettiest pop singles in recent memory. The lyrics are gorgeous and have more depth than they are given credit for, while that explosion of synths at the two and a half minute mark gets me every time. I just think this would have made a better album track. The Kish Mauve penned anthem sets the loved up tone of "Aphrodite" perfectly but it just isn't instant enough to be the chart smash that Kylie needed.

    Get Outta My Way

    Speaking of future hits, "Get Outta My Way" is destined to be huge. Cutfather and Lucas Secon have given Kylie another "Love At First Sight" for a whole new generation of fans. This is the kind of pure pop that Kylie does better than anyone. The lyrics make me laugh ("this is what'll happen if you ain't givin' your girl what she needs!"), that chorus is more addictive than heroin and the production is sleek without being sterile and overbearing. You can almost see the hordes of drunken girls rushing the dancefloor when this comes on. A lock for second single unless someone at Parlophone has a brain explosion.

    Put Your Hands Up (If You Feel Love)

    If "Get Outta My Way" is a return to the diva's pure pop roots, then this is her first real dance anthem since the "Fever" era. It's such a relief to hear a big, hearty blast of club Kylie after years of mid-tempo electronic tunes. This is exactly what she needs to win back the gays who have since moved on to Lady Gaga and would be my choice for the album's third single. Hooking up with the Nervo sisters turned out to be an inspired move and Starsmith cements his reputation as one of pop's hottest producers. The Italo-disco-tastic outro is particularly amazing. I can't wait to hear this in a nightclub.


    While not as memorable as her similarly titled 1992 B-side, "Closer" is a quirky little grower. It took me a while to warm to it but the track injects some much needed darkness and variety into "Aphrodite". I love the minimal beats and that bare bones of a chorus is strangely hypnotic. Stuart Price really lets his imagination run wild on this one. "Closer" belongs on the soundtrack to a 70s sci-fi film about a demented fembot that falls in love with its creator. Or maybe I just have too much time on my hands...

    Everything Is Beautiful

    I'm not exactly a Keane fan but Tim Rice-Oxley has a knack for writing melancholy tinged pop songs for fabulous divas. "Early Winter" is probably my favourite track on Gwen Stefani's "Sweet Escape" album and "Everything Is Beautiful" is one of the unexpected highlights of "Aphrodite". It's funny. I initially found this quite slow and boring in comparison to the rest of the album but the sleepy chorus slowly seeps into brain and I love how accurately the song channels Kylie's vulnerability and optimism. I don't think she's given enough credit for her ability to interpret other people's material. This song simply wouldn't work with anyone else.


    Oh here we go. The title track is already being thrown around as a 'fan favourite' but this "Hollaback Girl" meets "Wind It Up" rip off has already been done on "X". It didn't work there and doesn't sound that much better here. The only thing that saves it from being a total embarrassment is the brilliant chorus, which sounds like it belongs to an entirely different song. Having said all that - I see the appeal. "Aphrodite" is big, dumb fun that will inevitably be a showstopper when Kylie takes the album on tour. Who would have guessed that Nerina Pallot (and husband Andy) would come up with something this camp and ridiculous? I have an annoying feeling that it will be a future single.


    Kylie gets her first writing credit on "Illusion" and it sounds fairly autobiographical. Take the following lyric. "Follow my dreams into distant lands, blowing in the wind over shifting sands". I think Kylie was having a bit of a moment when she penned this in a bubble bath, sipping from a flute of champagne. Or so I'd like to imagine. "Illusion" isn't the catchiest song on the album but it holds a mirror to the darker side of love, which balances the almost dementedly happy mood of the rest of the album. The production is pure Stuart Price. Layered synths and vocals give the track an almost ethereal feel that makes it stand out from the rest of the album for all the right reasons.

    Better Than Today

    To be honest, I'm kind of surprised this made the album over the fabulous bonus tracks. Not because it's rubbish but because it's been doing the rounds in various forms since Kylie first performed it on her American tour earlier this year. "Better Than Today" still sounds like something Elton John recorded in 1978, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. I like the perky lyrics and catchy chorus. More importantly, the retro sound helps break up the album and showcases Kylie's versatility. Not my favourite song on the album but still a lot of fun.

    Too Much

    Now this is more like it. I think Calvin Harris is an overrated mess but it's hard to fault his work with Kylie. "In My Arms" was perhaps the highlight of "X" and I was part of the vocal minority that genuinely loved "Heart Beat Rock". This time around he teams up with Jake Shears, which turns out to be a match made in gay heaven. "Too Much" is a seriously brilliant pop song with the kind of explosive chorus that gets stuck in your head and refuses to leave. I love Calvin's playful production that chops and changes from dark and brooding at the beginning to a big, beautiful blast of 80s flavoured electronica. The lyrics are particularly gorgeous. "Can't say, can't say what it is, if I say what I feel it's too much" - is this the much longed for electro sequel to "Never Spoken"?

    Cupid Boy

    My friend Luciana wrote this with her equally talented husband Nick, so I'm probably completely biased. I was so excited when "Cupid Boy" made the final tracklist after she came heartbreakingly close to having two songs on "X" (the brilliant "Beat Of My Own Drum" and singleworthy smash that never happened "Dynamite") but nothing prepared me for the brilliance of this super sexy dancefloor anthem. No wonder Cheryl Cole (*vomits*) has hired Luciana's services for her sophomore album. While Kylie ponders the highs and lows of love and romance on the rest of "Aphrodite", Dannii's much older sister is looking for some hot lovin' on "Cupid Boy". A girl has needs! Apart from being the classiest song about a booty call ever recorded, it's also the most contemporary Kylie has sounded in years. The chorus is fire and the slinky verses seethe with longing. Roping in Sebastian Ingrosso (of Swedish House Mafia fame) to produce the track also turned out to be a masterstroke. He brings a club perspective to the proceedings while still respecting the song's pop origins. "Cupid Boy" would be a radio smash in this country.

    Looking For An Angel

    I thought "Looking For An Angel" was an absolute stinker when I first heard it at the "Aphrodite" listening party, labelling it a bad Dannii B-side. But I can admit when I'm wrong. After a couple of listens this is actually one of the album's cutest tracks. The sappy lyrics would be nauseating in the hands of anyone else but Kylie has an uncanny ability to make pure cheese ("so I dream of things like your golden wings") sound adorable. After keeping a lid on her natural tendency for all things high camp and over the top, I'm kind of glad Stuart Price let Kylie unleash on this relentlessly cheerful and upbeat anthem. A not so guilty pleasure that gets more charming each time I hear it.

    Can't Beat The Feeling

    Pascal Gabriel has to be the most underrated songwriter in pop music. If he's ever delivered a shit track, I'm yet to hear it and his work with Kylie has always been of the highest calibre (ie. "Tightrope" - easily the best song from the entire "Fever" era). I've been waiting for this reunion since 2001 and it was worth the wait. "Can't Beat The Feeling" is a burst of serotonin that sounds like a cross between "In My Arms" and "Love At First Sight". While I miss the bittersweet aftertaste of "Your Love" and "Tightrope", there is something quintessentially Kylie about this track. Which makes it the perfect way to close the album.


    Mighty Rivers

    I could write a thesis on Kylie's amazing ability to waste her best material as B-sides and bonus tracks and the trend continues on "Aphrodite". Bless. "Mighty Rivers" is the first of two Xenomania produced songs that didn't make the cut. In this case, it's understandable. The track is a little too moody for the album's upbeat tone and the lyric "mighty rivers run right through me" reminds me of a urinary tract infection I had in the 90s. That said, it is a gorgeous little tune that is well worth downloading. Emo-Kylie or as close as it gets on "Aphrodite".


    Japan is so lucky. Not only do they have the sexiest packaging (I'm sick for Obi strips) but they also get this amazing bonus track. Despite wasting the past decade on boring hacks like Girls Aloud, Xenomania occasionally pull one of the bag and "Heartstrings" is probably the best song they have written since contributing to Dannii's era defining "Girl" album. I would have swapped this with the title track or "Better Than Today". Unlike "Mighty Rivers", it fits the album's tone and theme perfectly and ranks as one of the loveliest songs Kylie has ever put her name to. Listen to this gorgeous gem below.


    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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All The Lesbians


    Dannii wins!

    In a desperate bid to steal the spotlight away from her more popular sister, Kylie planted a kiss on the Scissor Sister's Ana Matronic at Glastonbury this weekend. I know it must be cold there in Dannii's shadow but this G rated re-enactment of Lezzigate is not the answer! The much younger Minogue's steamy lesbian adventure with stunning British stripper Janine Marshall is the thing of legend. I mean, who could ever forget this iconic headline?

    While it must be hard for Kylie to accept Dannii's breathtaking TV $ucce$$ and unparalleled ability to re-release albums that no one bought in the first place, she can take heart in the fact that "Aphrodite" is an absolute fucking gem. I know I'm a bit late with my review but I find something new to love with each listen, so I just want to soak it up for a couple more days without analysing every beat, synth and lyric. In the meantime, watch Kylie get down and dirty with the Scissor Sisters. I love it. Time for another raw Intimate & Live type concert tour, I think!

    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Pop Panel - Week 9 - Trash Special

    Before we get started I really need to apologise for the song selection. I had a pretty awful week and tried to cheer myself up by overdosing on the trashiest pop music in my collection. It worked a treat but kind of spilled over into Pop Panel. So if nude models, Eurotrash divas and J Pop sluts don't float your boat - please don't waste your time reading any further because that's just the tip of the iceberg! I probably should be embarrassed but I love the dirty underbelly of pop and think most of these tunes are better than half the shit clogging up the charts. Take our winner. You won't find that kind of refined talent and exquisite beauty on the top 40! The followed judges were cruelly subjected to my trash fetish:

    D'Luv (US) writer of Chart Rigger and Idolator
    Mike (Aus) author of this classy blog
    Paul (UK) writer of Fizzy Pop
    The Prophet (Aus) writer of The Prophet
    Rob (UK) writer of Don't Stop The Pop


    Nasty G (Canada) writer of the much loved Isle Of Deserted Pop Stars and its underappreciated sister blog Lost Pop Treasures. Anyone who has had the pleasure of reading either of those exquisite sites will know that Nasty G is the perfect guest judge for trash week!

    As usual the songs are ranked from lowest to highest.

    Eliza Doolittle – Pack Up (Video)

    The UK's latest 'it' girl unveils her new single.

    D'Luv: Not really my thing. I want to say, “Sorry, hon — Amy Winehouse, Adele, Duffy, VV Brown, Pixie Lott, Janelle Monae and Nikki & Rich want their vaginas back,” but Eliza is charming enough. 2/5
    Mike: I usually hate these retro wannabes but there's something genuinely unaffected and uplifting about this cute tune. Eliza > Duffy... which isn't really saying much. 3.5/5
    Nasty G: The sound of yet another cipher fucking Amy Winehouse's corpse for a contact high. Enough already. Bleh. 1/5
    Paul: Oh she's so classy and elegant and relevant and just trying to hard to be cool isn't she? Ignore all of that annoyingness and I really do like the song where I didn't want to. I mean there are a million other girls singing this type of tune but I like the juxtaposition of the blokey sung chorus. She'll probably do a Cilmi and go disco pop for her next album. Can't wait! 4/5
    Rob: I want to like this. But I kinda feel the Motown/cockney thing has already been explored by Lily and of course Amy. Miss Doolittle, me thinks you've missed the boat. I also feel Paloma Faith does this sort of thing but a lot better. Cute video though. I want to be on that beach. 3/5
    The Prophet: Cute, but at this point in time I'm not in the mood for another one of these dime a dozen guirky UK 'it' girls. 0/5
    Total: 13.5/30

    Selena Gomez & The Sound – Round & Round (Video)

    Disney Queen follows up the surprisingly fun "Naturally".

    D'Luv: Not nearly as awesome as “Naturally” — which was my total jam of Spring 2010 — but it still has a charm to it. And by that I mean I played it twice last Monday and will probably never return to it again. I’m glad Selena isn’t stripping off and wearing bird feathers in her videos (yet) like some other slutbags out there, at least. 3/5
    Mike: It's no "Naturally" but if the silly bitch keeps this up, I'm gonna have to buy her fucking album. Rude. 2.5/5
    Nasty G: My brain says no. My booty says otherwise. This is everything I loathe, yet everything I love. "Naturally" was painfully good, and this keeps the teen girl in me satisfied. 3.5/5
    Paul: Sigh. "Naturally" was genius. This just isn't as good and I don't have the patience for it. It's like when I've had the pleasure moment in the sack and then they want to snuggle. "Naturally" was the pleasure moment; this is the snuggle. I just want to roll over and go to sleep thank you. 2/5
    Rob: The problem with this is that nearly any singer could have of sung this. Its digested everything poptastic of the last 3 yeas with the amazing ability to capitalise on all the boring bits of each great pop song released recently. Making this this an epic mountain of tepidness. 0/5
    The Prophet: I see that Selena has decided to emulate the iconic Hilary Duff by copying the "With Love" music video. It's so great when today's young stars to take inspiration from the legends who paved the way for them! 4/5
    Total: 15/30

    Joel Evan - Storm (Video)

    And the award for the best marketing strategy ever goes to this stunning vocalist. Joel hopes to further his music career by flashing his cock on as many gay porn websites as possible. Bless.

    D'Luv: Mike, where the FUCK do you find this stuff? 0/5
    Mike: I really hope this nude marketing fad takes off. Quick, someone call Jack Peñate's A&R! The song itself is... interesting. Sure, the chorus makes me want to stab my ears with the nearest sharp object but I've heard a lot worse. Wash off the guy-liner and keep flashin' that cock, Joel. 5/5
    Nasty G: And here I thought that the sublime artistry of The London Boys was lost forever! Thank you Joel (or the steroidal ghost of Sylvester Stallone's much more talented brother Frank) for making an old queen cry tears (or whatever bodily fluid that 'rain' is in the video) of joy! I will indeed take you up on your offer and take shelter under your over-developed pecs, or nose, or penis. 4/5
    Paul: Oh Jesus Christ, you are fucking kidding me. 0/5 and if I can deduct points that other people may give him, I would!
    Rob: Technically, the vocal in the verses are 'presentable' and then something seriously goes odd during the chorus. It goes all deep. How will he be the shelter from the storm exactly? Do his enlarged muscles and willy act as a conductors for the lightening? He doesn't explain. Sadly. Is this actually a song about death and electrocution? I need to know. 2/5
    The Prophet: The song is WRETCHED. Like, below zero. But, he has a huge cock, so I'm willing to overlook it. 4/5 (for size of his prize).
    Total: 15/30

    Danielle DeLaite – Nothing To Wear (below)

    This stunning Australian diva describes her music as a mixture between Kylie and Janet - with a splash of J Lo. No, seriously.

    D'Luv: She might have opted to so a little smoke and mirrors with her unfortunate face by having Joel Evans’ cock shoved down her throat in the video. Just a suggestion. The song’s a snooze. 1/5
    Grant: Now I know what that coworker who eats Ramen noodles for lunch every day and goes home to her cats every night does in her spare time. This exists solely to prove what a creative genius Rachel Stevens is. 2/5
    Mike: Danielle is Australia's gift to the world. Unfortunately, we have a no returns policy. 5/5
    Paul: No no no. It does not look good to me. It does not make your body look sexy. All the video screams is that she enjoys lying in the wet patch. And that is what this single is - an unwelcome and uncomfortable wet patch of a tune. 1/5
    Rob: At least this has personality. I give it a bonus point for the massive hair. 1/5
    The Prophet: This is so embarrassing. I'd give it a five for being so tragic, but Kumi and Nadine already filled up the trash quota for this week. I'm really stuck between a rock and a hard place. God, Cher's mermaid wig and the knock-off designer bag in the sand is just too stunning to penalize. 5/5
    Total: 15/30

    Kumi Koda – Lollipop (Video)

    Um, I don't think this J Pop superstar is actually singing about candy....

    D'Luv: Five points for the hot, tacky video, minus two for the dated song that sounds like Britney B-side from 2003. 3/5
    Mike: Oh look, Britney is now officially redundant. 5/5
    Grant: Usually J-pop turns my stomach, so I have to thank Kumi for finally helping me empty it. The only track I ever got into was her duet with pee-stained leatherface Fergie, and that was only after many cocktails. More inane J-Pop. Hoo-ray. But she gets an extra point for saying 'booty' repeatedly. 2/5
    Paul: I've been pronouncing her name as Cummy all week which is probably wrong but oh so appropriate for this song. It's dead tinny, casio produced nonsense, but I do enjoy a slutty undertone and she rode that horse hard and good in the video so I'll double her score. 2/5
    Rob: Hey girl its 2010. Not 2001. Incredibly numb-inducing. 0/5
    The Prophet: If Lil' Wayne's 'Lollipop' was his penis, then I'm assuming that Kumi's must be her clitoris. When is someone going to lick my lollipop? 4.5/5
    Total: 16.5/30

    Susanna Kay – Off The Hook

    Holland's classiest pop diva! (Video)

    D'Luv: She’d look so pretty with parts of her strewn throughout the trunk of my car. 4/5
    Mike: Someone finally had the decency to give Portia de Rossi a record deal! Apart from being a dead ringer for Australia's most famous lesbian, Susanna knows how to knock out a catchy pop tune. I love this trash and the video is a drag queen's wet dream. Delicious. 4.5/5
    Nasty G: Take the talent, personality and beauty of Kylie, Gaga and Madge (well, circa 1990), mix it in a blender with some Cream Of Wheat and one of Elin Lanto's rejects, then dilute it with a gallon of water, and this is what you get. So innocuous that I can't help but give it a decent score. 3/5
    Paul: I really liked Holland the few times I've been. It was all hookers touching themselves in shop windows and lovely architecture. This is pretty similar to that - it mixes trashy elements with solidly classic sing a long chorus. It would be nice if she found her own identity instead of trying to be Pink meets Gaga meets Katy Perry but it's only single one so she gets 3/5.
    Rob: The Edurne original is a lot better. I give it low scores because I love Spanish pop princess Edurne and I don't love this Lady GaGa rip off. 0/5
    The Prophet: Oh another RedOne B-side. It is kinda catchy though. 2/5
    Total: 16.5/30

    Scarlett Belle – Closure (Video)

    Two failed Aus/Pop Idol rejects join forces to create Australia's newest girlband.

    D'Luv: See, this is what The Saturdays need to do — cut away the chaff (i.e. all members but Frankie and, uh, one of those other ones with cheap London tits) — and just have a pair warble their formulaic jams. Don’t dislike this. For some reason kind of reminds me of Jordin Sparks’ “Tattoo”? 2.5/5
    Mike: Tamara will never top the breathtaking awfulness of her solo smash "Ooh Ahh" but this is surprisingly inoffensive if you don't watch the so wrong it verges on criminal video. The B-side ("Girl That Weeps") is also worth hunting down. 3.5/5
    Nasty G: I guess that I should drag that Scandal'Us CD out of the litter box it is lining if this is what it hath wrought! During our weekly (drunken) video session, this randomly came on, and my man pricked up his ears, which is notable because usually he's left lifeless from the barrage of offensive girly pop I subject him to. The words "This reminds me of Brit & Alex" ensured that this would forever be in heavy rotation. 4/5
    Paul: Hmmm, it's like some dance remix of a Ryan Tedder song; big crashing drums, fairly singable chorus. It's not the most horrible tune I've heard all week but that's hardly a glowing compliment is it? I think there is a vague charm about it so I'm awarding it an average 3/5.
    Rob: I like this despite the fact that the "its over" refrain is incredibly boring. Again, points knocked off for those Lady GaGa/Rihanna caste-offs. 2/5
    The Prophet: Keri Hilson called - She wants her flop back. 2/5
    Total: 17/30


    Nadine Sutherland – Cougar (below)

    Can we all just call this masterpiece the winner and be done?

    D'Luv: Bow down to Nadine’s wig and hail the cougar! My favorite part is when she’s in the blue outfit gyrating in front of the Mercedes. Total WIN! Sade wishes she were this classy. 5/5
    Grant: Indisputable proof that the cougar is the most fearsome - and sexy - carnivore in the animal kingdom. And that Rick James' weave didn't die with him. Mama is hotter than a hot flash! And I'm proud to say that I am undoubtably the only bitch on the pop panel who already owns one of her CDs, which likely came from the delete bin that the Scandal'Us CD came from, but still... 5/5
    Mike: I wonder if Kylie's Botox dealer blasts this stunning anthem from his back alley clinic to drum up business. 5/5
    Paul: Just imagine, for one millisecond, that this was actually the comeback song for faded 80s teen idol Debbie Gibson! How amazing would that be (who also has a song out called "Cougar"!) Anyway, there is something both grotesquely hideous about this but like seeing a sad old man in a ford focus pick up an ageing prostitute on the side of the road, you can't really not pay attention. It's bad-good. 4/5
    Rob: This is shit. 0/5
    The Prophet: The mi-goren noodle hair sealed the deal for me. 5/5
    Total: 24/30

    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Victoria Silvstedt Returns To Save Music!

    I can barely breathe. My second favourite Swedish trash Queen (after Bionda) has deigned to bless the music world with a stunning new single and glamorous high budget video! Victoria Silvstedt is probably best known in Australia for her reality TV show My Perfect Life but before she became a professional fame whore, the multi-talented 1997 Playmate of the Year dabbled in lots of different things. She launched her own lingerie line, tried her luck as an actress in America and had a brief music career in Sweden. It's the latter that turned me into a fan. Her 1999 smash "Hello Hey" is legendary among trash connoisseurs for its sheer sonic brilliance and I'm glad the pop revolutionary is still churning out songs that show up her flop countrywoman Robyn as the sad, pathetic joke she's become. "Saturday Night" is an inspired cover of the Whigfield classic that showcases the diva's glorious autotuned vocals and unprecedented ability to talk her way through songs. Uffie is such a thief! I love the cheesy production and classy video. Victoria basically poses in a bikini, rides around on a yacht and dances in a club. Just another day for her then. Brace yourself for the fabulousness below.

    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Kelis - 4th of July (Fireworks)

    "4th of July (Fireworks)" is the second single from Kelis' fifth album, Flesh Tone. She performed the song for the first time on North American television on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno on June 18th. Since its release, the song has reached #49 on the U.S. Hot Dance Club Play charts.Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Shontelle Actually Has A Hit...

    No, seriously! This week "Impossible" climbs all the way to #17 on the US charts - becoming the Barbadian diva's first biggest hit. I'm so happy for her. Shontelle instantly became a guilty pleasure when I learned that she was calling her debut album "Shontelligence" (yes, I'm that easy!) and moved into fan territory when Rihanna stans cruelly dubbed her the beast of Barbados. Girlfriend can't help looking like a man! Anyway, they are probably just jealous of Shontelle's stunning $ucce$$ now that she's officially an international megastar. I just never thought "Impossible" would be the song to break her. In fact, I'll even admit to initially hating it but I can now see the error of my ways. The power ballad is an absolute grower that becomes more addictive with each listen. The arrangement is very 90s and there's no denying that my girl can sing RiRi under the table! Although that's not really saying very much...

    As much as I like "Impossible" and hope it continues to rocket up the charts - I vastly prefer the follow up/international lead single. "Licky" was unveiled way back in January but is still listed as the second single from Shontelle's forthcoming sophomore album. Apparently, it will also serve as the international single and has just been remixed by a bunch of America's hottest DJs. Regardless of its status, "Licky" is one of the hottest songs of 2010. I love the dirty lyrics and that chorus is catchier than cholera. One listen and you'll be humming along to "L-I-licky-C-K-licky-Y". Can Universal please release this in Australia so I can get some relief from "Rated R"? I guarantee that it will be huge. On my blog. Maybe just ignore the video (below). It's probably what started the rumours about Shontelle having man parts. The Gaga gone wrong hooded dress and fringed boots combination is all kinds of nasty and that feathered jacket isn't much better. Anyway, I'm sure we can all agree that Rihanna is now officially redundant. And that's got to be a cause for celebration!

    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Adam Lambert - If I Had You

Aphrodite - Listening Party

    Earlier tonight I went along to Warner Australia's "Aphrodite" listening party and finally had the chance to hear Kylie's exquisite new album in full. I'm surprised I wasn't uninvited (like Alanis) after my last post but I'm glad no one held a grudge. The Prophet - my hot date to the event - has already written a mini-review and I pretty much agree with every word. As expected from the megamix and Amazon preview clips, "Aphrodite" is almost flawless. I'll have to play it again a couple (of hundred) more times to make my final verdict but, on first listen, it's very, very impressive.

    I was particularly surprised by how different some of the tracks sound from the previews - notably "Put Your Hands Up (If You Feel Love)", which is screaming out to be a future single and the endearingly trippy "Closer". As for the rest, "Get Outta My Way" still sounds like a sure bet as second single and Luciana's "Cupid Boy" is even more dark and delicious in its finished form. Most of the people I spoke to singled out the title track as a standout but to my ears it's a bit of a throwback to the Gwen Stefani-esque shenanigans on "X". Think the tour version of "Heart Beat Rock" with a better chorus. The Prophet got his stan on for "Illusion" and "Too Much" but I was more impressed with the album's only mid-tempo moment - the gorgeous "Everything Is Beautiful" - and relentlessly joyful "Can't Beat The Feeling". Bless Pascal Gabriel. We both agreed that "Looking For An Angel" is the only real stinker but it kind of sounds like a Dannii B-side so it will probably be my favourite track on the album by the time it's released!

    There really isn't much to criticise and I'm ruthless when it comes to Kylie - only because I love her so much and hold her to a higher standard than second rate imposters like Madonna and Britney! If pushed, I almost found it too cohesive. I kind of miss the rough around the edges playfulness of "X". A little bit of shit sometimes makes you appreciate the gems all the more! I also think the second half is ever so slightly weaker than the first but that is being extremely picky. "Aphrodite" is a stunning return to form that would have been a perfect follow-up to "Fever". In just, it picks up where that album left off - just with a slightly mellower, loved up perspective and a fresh batch of collaborators. Heidi, Ke$ha and Lolene now have serious competition for album of the year! Expect a full review when the album leaks is released.

    EDIT: The album has leaked (and no, it wasn't me)! Expect a full review in the next couple of days.Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Kelly Rowland - Commander (feat. David Guetta)

Selena Gomez & the Scene - Round & Round

Casey Donovan Is Big, Beautiful & Sexy!

    I've always felt a bit sorry for Casey Donovan. The 2004 Australian Idol winner never got a fair shot. Sony clearly had no idea what to do with a curvy, chain smoking teenager and basically pulled the plug on her career after releasing a shoddy cash-in album. It's a shame because "For You" had at least one great song ("What's Going On?") - which is more than Damien Leith, Natalie Gauci and Wes Carr can say! As far as Idol alumni go, I think she ranks up there with Lisa Mitchell as the most unique and hardest to market. At least Lisa could fall back on the indie crowd, while poor Casey spent the past few years touring RSL clubs and promoting weight loss products. Well, the plucky diva has decided to take things into her own hands by independently recording a steamy comeback anthem called "Big, Beautiful & Sexy". As as you can see from the performance below - Casey is taking the song's title literally! The delicious songstress will set temperatures soaring with her saucy outfit (a figure hugging corset and tutu) and attitude filled lyrics. I honestly think this is a great song and I'd forgotten that Emma wasn't the only member of the Donovan clan with a fucking amazing voice. Bring on the finished version! To promote this smash in the making, Casey is taking her "Big, Beautiful & Sexy" tour on the road. For more information check out her Facebook. See you there! Thanks to Jacques for the heads up.

    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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All The Lovers - An Australian Flop?

    "All The Lovers" debuted at #14 in Australia this week, becoming the second lowest charting lead single of Kylie's career. In fact, only "Some Kind Of Bliss" performed worse (landing at #27 in 1997) and that was released at the absolute nadir of her popularity. It's a bit depressing but hardly unexpected. I reviewed the song a month ago and wrote the following:

    As much as I adore the song, I do have some criticisms. Well, one big one. I really hope I'm wrong but I don't think "All The Lovers" is a particularly smart lead single from a commercial standpoint. Kylie needed to steal her sister's crown as the undisputed Queen of Clubs instead of returning with what is essentially an electronic Mother's Day anthem. Fans have likened the song to "I Believe In You" and "The One" but neither of those set the charts on fire outside of England.

    Sometimes I hate being right. The Kylie faithful will tell you that "All The Lovers" is a grower and will get a boost with the release of the physical single (in stores Friday) but I doubt it. The song has fallen out of the top 20 on iTunes and has stalled on radio. Strangely, I'm not that bothered. If the album is half as good as the "Aphrodite" megamix suggests, then Dannii's much older sister will be spoilt for choice when it comes to picking future singles and she can take heart from the song's top 5 debut in the UK and top 10 position in Germany. However - given that "All The Lovers" has received almost universal praise from fans and critics - what the fuck went wrong in this country?

    Some militant Al Kylieda members have blamed the song leaking a couple of weeks in advance but I think that's ridiculous. More people legally downloaded "Your Love Is My Drug" last week and that's the third single from an album that's being doing the rounds online since January. Then there's the usual chant of "no promotion", which is slightly more valid. Australia hasn't really been a priority for Kylie since she exploded internationally in 2001 and the remote control approach to what is traditionally her second biggest market has been slowly backfiring ever since. However, Kylie did just as little promotion for "Slow" and "2 Hearts" and they both reached #1.

    In my opinion, the problem lies with the dud remix package (Dada Life and XXXChange just don't cut it over here) and the fact that she went with another mid-tempo tune. Kylie really needed to come back with a dancefloor anthem that appealed to the half a million or so people that spent $20 on "Fever". As pretty and dreamy and perfect as it is, "All The Lovers" is too subtle and way too European for a market currently ruled by Katy Perry and Ke$ha.

    Fortunately, every song on that "Aphrodite" megamix sounds more instant and radio friendly than the lead single. I honestly have such a good feeling about this album and think it has the potential to be absolutely massive. Kylie HQ just needs to be a bit smarter about single choices and make sure they are tailoring them for different markets. Particularly when it comes to the clubs. Get TV Rock or Hook N Sling to remix "Get Outta My Way" so it will actually be played in an Australian club outside of Oxford Street. Go with a different song if the UK's choice won't work over here. If an act as big as Pink can be bothered with Australia only singles, why can't Kylie?

    Anyway, here are the living legend's 11 lead singles and their chart position from 1987 - 2010. A top 15 hit 23 years into a career is actually a pretty amazing achievement. I just think we all have so much affection for Kylie, we can't help but want more for her.

    1987 Locomotion - #1
    1994 Confide In Me - #1
    1989 Hand On Your Hand - #4
    1990 Better The Devil You Know - #4
    1991 Word Is Out - #10
    1997 Some Kind Of Bliss - #27
    2000 Spinning Around - #1
    2001 Can't Get You Out Of My Head - #1
    2003 Slow - #1
    2007 2 Hearts - #1
    2010 All The Lovers - #14

    On the bright side, at least Kylie's not as big a flop as Robyn, Kelly Rowland or Christina Aguilera! And she's the only person who can fall flat on her fanny and still look fabulous in the process. For video evidence watch this iconic moment below!

    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Justin Bieber - Somebody To Love (Remix) (feat. Usher)

    "Somebody to Love" is the second single from Canadian recording artist Justin Bieber's album, My World 2.0. Bieber re-recorded the song with full featured vocals from Usher. The remix version of the song is an upbeat dance song, with R&B tones with influences of Eurodisco. It was released to mainstream and rhythmic radio on April 20, 2010. To date, the song has peaked at #47 on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100.Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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Stop Press: La Toya Reunites With Bubbles!

    Toy Toy's new status as the people's princess has been underlined by her latest act of selfless philanthropy. Just days after fanning the flames of Michael Jackson's memory by serenading Russia with a glorious live rendition of "Earth Song", the tireless humanitarian has captured the hearts and minds of millions around the globe by emotionally reuniting with her dead brother's chimpanzee. In a lucky coincidence, cameras were rolling to capture the moment and the footage is breathtaking. La Toya is the first member of the Jackson clan to visit Bubbles at the Florida ape sanctuary (cruel Janet is clearly too busy releasing flop albums to care) and she is genuinely overwhelmed by the occasion. I love it when Toy lovingly hoses the chimp down and tries to get his attention by loudly calling out her name. But the defining exchange begins at about 3:20 mins when Michael's favourite sister bursts into tears and asks Bubbles if he remembers her. It's simultaneously heartbreaking and hilarious. Some people question La Toya's intentions even though she's made it clear that her only mission in life is to free the world but I think she's completely dedicated to maintaining Michael's memory - even if it means postponing her sure to be #1 platinum smash hit album for another 9 years. Warning: This video is a real tearjerker. It actually made me cry!

    Source URL: http://popmusicrecords.blogspot.com/2010/06/
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